My First Book Was Bullsh*t

Last night, I had a friend tell me (mid-text argument, like we’re teenagers) in no uncertain terms that my first book was bullshit.

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Even though I wanted to do my typical fiery thing and come back with a quip or intentionally-hurtful remark, I took a second to review the situation and realized…

My friend was right.

Looking back at the book, I know now that I could have done better. For the readers, I imagine that reading it was something akin to watching someone try to drink from a fire hose: cringe-inducing, tough… painful?

But if that’s how people feel about it, imagine how it was for me to write it. It was like the fire hydrant–I had all of these ideas and emotions, and I really thought I had a new concept to share.

And I still feel like it was a great idea.

But the execution was pretty bad. I couldn’t get my brain to sift through and sort out this huge idea that I had conceptualized and researched and cared about for months. And that is where I can take away something from this experience, from this criticism.

I will never be ashamed for putting myself out there, or for taking a risk, or exploring a new idea… At least I did something to grow. Putting my ideas into the world was a challenge, an adventure. I was scared. As soon as I submitted it, I broke into a cold sweat!

But everything has to start somewhere.

‘Living Gold’ helped me explore the ways we interact & understand how I can do better to treat people in a way that allows their best self to shine. I will never apologize for coming up with ideas about how to be better to each other. But if you read it & hated it (or me for writing it), I’ll buy you a beer or ftoyo to make it up & we can chat. I think I’m better in-person…