We had just set up camp by Quanah Parker Lake, and I felt drawn to sit on a log that lay near the campsite.
As I settled onto the wood and closed my eyes, the fresh air filled my lungs. As I exhaled, goosebumps crept over my skin and I could feel the stress leave with my breath.
A light breeze rustled the trees and cooled my skin. My body filled with stillness.
I inhaled again and nearly drowned in euphoria. My entire body smiled.
And then:
“You’re back with me.”
The words were as clear as the sky above my head. I could even feel the pleased tone behind them, as if I had fulfilled a hopeful expectation simply by showing up. It was like coming home after a long absence to a loved one who had been patiently and knowingly waiting for my return.
Eyes still closed, a smile crept across my face as I turned toward the sun and felt the warmth through my closed eyelids.
I thought, ‘I sure am back.’
Then my eyes shot open.
I looked around. Who had I answered?
Back up one step: Where did those words come from?
I had just gotten there, to a place I had never been before. But somehow I was back. How was that possible? And why did I immediately agree?
I was overcome with emotion as my brain tried to make sense of that experience, to reconcile what I knew with the unknowable.
I remained full of serenity, but didn’t know what to make of it. I had succumbed completely for a brief moment, without a second thought, and felt oddly displaced outside of that stillness.
But it stayed with me, even when I became conscious of myself and my surroundings again. It gave me peace to feel it there, even when my mind did all it could to push that feeling away. It felt steady and kind, vigilant, as if it would remain there until I could join it again.
Almost a month later, I’m still bewitched by the experience. It left me with a sense of longing for concrete answers and for my spirit to be back in that place. I feel compelled to figure it out, but without directions on how to start. So I’ve been quiet and patient, hoping to feel its presence again and to find the answers like it found me in the woods that day.
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If you’re reading this and have had any spiritual experience, please share it with me. Contact form goes right to my email, and I’d be really interested to hear your thoughts!